It's strange. I remember writing my first post on this blog about unpacking my bags, excited for my new life in Tel-Aviv. Here I am, months later, writing a post about packing up.
This year has been hands down, the most powerful time of my entire life. Everything I knew as normal has been turned upside down. I see the world in a different way, having met friends who span the entire globe who feel like family at this point. While being here in Israel, I got to volunteer for an organization who I believe to be one of the most important in this country. When signing up for my volunteering, I wanted to work somewhere that provided a neccesary service to Israel--something that truly made a difference. While I wasn't the man behind the screen, taking care of patients, I truly feel like I got to contribute to the place, providing an understanding of what it does and how important it is to Israel.
Natal is an organization that was originally founded to help soldiers deal with post-traumatic stress after difficult tours of duty. Eventually, however, it found that people from all across Israel suffer from post-trauma--that it is truly a national disease. Thousands have been effected by terrorism here and by war. Everyone is connected somehow to a tragic accident--whether a family member or a friend was taken, whether it was witnessing a suicide bombing, whether it is living under the shadow of daily rocket fire, or whether it was living in an army base in constant fear of death.
Before getting into what Natal does, one has to ask themselves, "what happens when an entire society is affected by a debilitating psychological illness?" PTSD causes its victims to break down sometimes to the point where they can no longer live normal lives, unable to work or raise a family. It causes people to hate. It confuses people. So if an entire society that constantly lives under the threat of war and terror fails to develop resiliency through trauma, then they will break down. Peace in the middle east, if however possible, will also fail. Finally, hope will fail, and when hope fails, all else is lost.
I came to Israel with all sorts of opinions about the conflict, but as I learned more and more, I came to find that there is no perfect stance. There is a war of values, of how the history is to be written, and a real war on the ground. I find today, that I can lean one way or the other on any given day. When you look at this conflict on a deeper level, and try and comprehend the way that the average person lives through it, it brings about completely different emotions. People are driven to find revenge. The effects of Post-Trauma are poisonous, and they breed hate. We can try to create political solutions, but they can only help so much. So long as both sides harbor hate and seek revenge for each others actions, prospects of peace--a real lasting peace where both sides can work together for a better future--will break down.
Since working here, the way I travel has changed. When hiking in the Golan heights, I could not get the thoughts of the wars out of my head. I saw ruins of villiages, and I felt compassion, but at the same time, a complete understanding that things are just screwed up. The only way to alleviate the pains is to treat the scars.
I remember staring at the blades of grass around me as I sat eating lunch. During war, these fields would endure constant artillery fire. They would be burned. They would be trenched. But years later, with sunlight and rain, they grew again, and look as much the same as they did before.
War can change things. Lands will change ownership. People will be hurt. However, the only way to get past what has happened is to heal, to grow. We may not be able to find a political solution any time soon. However, we can change the way we think. We can heal from what happened to us. We can forgive. We can be resilient. If we are strong, and don't allow the trauma to kill us, we can learn from it and grow taller than we have ever been.
Israel lives in constant turmoil, but somehow is in the OECD, boasts some of the best technology in the world, has a somewhat decent economy, and a democracy. If we had allowed the Holocaust and all of its trauma to break us down, we would be dead. However, after thousands of years of persecution, we decided to rise up and create something for ourselves--and we sure did. So long as we can learn from our pain, and use it motivate us, anything is possible--even peace.
I want to thank Natal so much for the opportunity it gave me to reflect on Israeli culture, Jewish culture, my perspective on life, and who I am. I feel now a much stronger drive to help my community. I feel much more compassionate to those who hurt. They say, "your only as strong as your weakest link." Therefore, it is our duty to strengthen those of our society who are hurt, broken down, and unable to move on. It is our duty to grow.
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